The Courage To Dream Again

(adapted from a letter to a friend)

Return, Fear, and The Nature of True Dreams.

* * * * *

1. RETURN: Return to whatever dream, if it happened, would fill you up, and make you happy. But really imagine it happening. Is it the work that makes you happy in and of itself, or is it the recognition, the pay-off? What work makes you happy, all by itself? What feels good? If we don’t know what that is, that’s ok. At least we’re opening the door of wonder, to find out.

2. FEAR: We’re afraid to try again because we’re looking at it wrong. Let’s say you starred in your own film, won an Oscar, and I won a Pulitzer for my stuff. Now what? Pressure’s on. Are you a one hit wonder? Am I? There are expectations now. Let’s say we get a few successes, get used to that, but what then? Will it be a lifelong success, or will we fall out of fashion? Become has-beens? Is that less terrifying than being a never-was?

You and I are wrong to think our dreams are broken because our last efforts didn’t turn out the way we’d hoped. There is no finish line, no Destination except this moment; no ending point, except our last breath. Every time we try and hope for something, its always going to be the same risk. Doesn’t matter if the last thing failed or succeeded. The next thing will be just as risky. The same is true for everyone who tries for a dream, at any time at any age.

3. THE NATURE OF TRUE DREAMS: If our dreams are age restrictive, they’re not true dreams. You wanted to be an A-list actor before you were 30, and I wanted my novel to be a best-seller by that time. The reason these dreams weren’t real, is they had a finishline, a delusion disguised as hope that said, “When I hit THIS I’ve made it!

But like the #2 Fear paragraph says, there is no “made it!” No finishline that makes everything great, forever. Success can even increase pressure and fear. So if we still want those same things, if those really are our dreams, we need to change them up in our minds to be True Dreams. A true actor’s dream might be: I’m going to give my all to be the best actor I can be; I will devote the rest of my life to improving my craft to give all that I can.

Who can take that dream away? Who can stop us from doing that at any age? That is a dream independent of circumstance and industry, reliant only upon our Devotion. That is a lifelong mission statement. With that lifelong mission statement, whether failure or success comes, it won’t derail us.

Both success and failure are great at derailing dreamers. Look how many die at the top. Even if success lasted the rest of your life or mine, the fulfillment it brought would leave, unless the work is fulfilling, in and of itself, which takes us back to paragraph #1 RETURN.

That’s why we need to define that True dream, the work that is fulfilling all by itself, and that lifelong mission statement, that is independent of success and failure.

Success and Failure are ripples on a pond. But the True Dream, the Lifelong Mission Statement, is the Pond. We need the pond, not the ripples that come and go.

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A Love Letter

Someone I love was in suffering.

I wrote him a letter.

He placed it where he could see it daily.

He said it helped him.

I am sharing this letter here.

Maybe it will be of use to you.

The approach is always useful to me.

It is based in the teachings of Thich Nhat Hanh.

* * * * * * * * * * *

My Dearest,

I’m so very sorry to hear you are struggling with things.

I believe in you and I have a suggestion.

Hanh says in practice, we can bring happiness to ANY moment.

Take the time to tend to yours, please.

Stop and take 20, just to breathe with an uplifting mantra,

with DEVOTION.

Check out of your life and into your breath.

Breathing in, I feel Calm.

Breathing out, I Smile.

Breathing in, Dwelling in this Present Moment

Breathing out, I Know this is a wonderful Moment.

(One of Hanh’s.)

Reversal mantras too, are an instant turn around.

Take the issue that is bringing you difficulty;

if it is prosperity for example:

Breathing in, I am Completely Relaxed.

Breathing out, I am earning well doing what I most love!

This practice can be called on to bring peace and a healing mindset for any life challenge.

There are two forms of prayer: supplication and affirmation.

When you affirm what you wish as if it has already happened,

that is a powerful prayer.

When you plead for circumstances to be different,

you affirm your deliverance has not happened.

I think this is why the sansrkit chants are celebratory.

* * * * * * * * * * *

These are the times to lean on your practice.

You have a mala. Put it to use.

Its what it is around your neck for, Darling. : )

I love you so very much.

You have a Universe to turn to.

Don’t carry it all yourself, ok?

 

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The Self-Love Mantra/Mudra

Everything

we

do

touch

think

create

Achieve

in our life

emanates from us.

So whatever it is we need or want

will be come through us best

if we love ourselves more

and doubt ourselves less.

The Self Love Mantra/Mudra

is an audible or silent chant

using the fingers.

Think of the Thumb as “Myself”

for you are the Central Figure

in all that happens in your Life.

The Forefinger,

is

“My Home,”

*

The Second finger,

is

“My Town,”

*

The Third finger,

is

“My Work,” 

*

The Fourth finger 

is

“My Life.” 

*

Put the tip of your forefinger on the tip of your thumb.

Breathe in and think

“I Love Myself,”

Breathe Out and think,

“I Love My Home,” 

Put the tip of your second finger to the tip of your thumb

Breathe in and think,

“I Love Myself,”

Breathe Out and think,

“I Love My Town,”

Put the tip of your third finger to the tip of your thumb

Breathe in and think,

“I Love Myself,”

Breathe out and think,

“I Love My Work,” 

Put the tip of your little finger to the tip of your thumb.

Breathe in and think,

“I Love Myself,”

Breathe Out and think,

“I Love My Life,” 

As you Inhale Deeply,

FILL YOURSELF WITH LOVE

As you Exhale

Feel yourself sharing this love

with the surrounding body of your

home,

town

work

&

life.

These four four-letter words,

encapsulate the entire existence.

Your “work” is not only the work itself

but everyone that work touches and affects.

Even if you don’t like your work

the mantra will either help you see what you love in it

or transport you to work you truly do love.

And “Life” certainly is the Catch-All.

Nothing is excluded.

And if you live in a city

use the word ‘town’ anyway.

It is monosyllabic,

more personal

and keeps the mantra

in perfect rhythm.

In deep still slow-breath meditation

More time and visualization

can be applied to each of the four stages.

In fast meditation

such as a brisk walk,

you can tap your fingers,

and mentally chant

with every footfall.

*

Its a very flexible mantra

and a very powerful one.

Filling yourself with Love

has

Astonishing Impact.

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Bryant and the Chicken Lady

I love my neighborhood.

I feel safe walking at night.

I went up to the local drugstore,

open 24 hours,

and saw Bryant again,

a man on the street

I met around Thanksgiving.

He said, “I remember you!

You gave me a whole cooked chicken!

Man, that was good!”

I said, “I know,

I got one for me too.”

He was chilled and shivering,

nose was running,

but smiling

with his kind eyes.

I asked if he needed anything,

He said, “No, I’m fine.”

I asked “Are you sure?”

He said,

“Yeah, I’m great no worries.”

I asked if he’d be in the parking lot when I came out.

He said ‘Yes.’

I got some cash when I checked out

and went out to give it to him.

I laughed out loud when I saw

a line,

a little line of people,

waiting,

to give Bryant money.

Ha!

And we were all waiting,

because when someone helps Bryant,

Bryant wants to take the time

to make each one of us

feel appreciated.

Then a man comes out of the market.

He told us we were idiots!

He said,

“This guy is just cleaning up!”

“Get a job!” he yelled at Bryant.

I was last in line,

nearest to the grouch,

and he said to me as he walked off,

“You know he’s taking all of you, don’t you?”

And I said, “No.

He’s giving to all of us.

We’re all just running one more errand in a day

and Bryant gives us the chance

to feel like we’re giving something

that means something

to someone.

He remembers each one of us,

He gives us his kindness,

and

best of all,

he makes each one of us

feel appreciated.

When have you bought so much

for a couple of bucks?”

I’d like to say I reached this cranky man,

and he joined us in line, 

But that didn’t happen.

I did however,

get a little round of applause,

from we who found it worth the wait

and the spare change,

to feel we gave something meaningful,

to be remembered,

to receive such kindness

from our neighbor temporarily without a home,

and best of all,

to feel

our presence mattered today.

Thank you, Bryant.

If

you

ask

me,

you’re not charging enough!

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The Hour Of The Changing Light

She teaches me

how fast it all goes,

how to savor This.

Were it not for Her

I may have spent life

not living,

only doing,

fretting and frittering

my fading hours away

in endless to-do’s

and

never

ever

ever

be.

 *

She makes me feel

a soft yet horribly deep sorrow

at the time I’ve lost

within the false state:

Alive, but not recognizing Life! 

The state of unreason

cultures are built upon.

*

She reminds me to honor

in Sacred Devotion and Gratitude

The setting Sun,

sacred in its own right,

and all it represents:

All that Enters and gives Life,

then leaves us alone in Night,

to softly find a way back in,

to lure us into Light again.

*

The cycles of Life,

of Light

of Love,

The cycles of All Creation.

*

All this She Teaches

in Her sensual adieu

To the God of The Golden Orange Light,

whose Emergence and Disappearance

Form the Magic Hour

Where yin and yang kiss,

And become one another,

And the veil between

fades to naught.

*

The realm of opposites join here:

Ra to Luna.

Birth to Death.

Light to Dark.

God to Man,

The hour in which we may

 whisper to Spirits,

And Spirits may whisper

Sacred Truths to us.

 *

She devotes Herself

to Ra’s egress

with all Her Western faces.

Her delicate, graceful fingers,

gently caressing even the last fleeting trace

of precious fading Light.

*

I feel Her yearning, reaching,

even unto the last dying sunbeam.

So glorious, to see a Tree in Prayer!

So glorious to be aware!

So glorious to have Eyes that See,

 if only in shared sunsets,

in which She helps me enter,

The Sacred Awareness.

*

She awakens me

through gentleness

through delicacy,

That I may see with Pure eyes.

*

She lures my Awareness

 into the most subtle aspects of Her Grace

That I may recognize within myself,

all I am drawn to in Her.

In the breath, in the poise, in the fingers,

in the step, in the balance, in the motion,

in the gentleness and the delicacy,

the busy noise of mind can fade

that I may discover

even the to-do’s

are better achieved

When lost in the gentleness and grace of the doing.

*

My Great Teacher,

What greater lesson could be taught,

than how to be Alive in Life?

*

Magic things happen

through the Sacred Awareness,

In the Hour of the Changing Light.

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Thanksgiving Sunrise

I am Thankful for the Many Blessings!

Thank You, Great Creator!

Gifts upon this Day:

A transcendent Sunrise

And a new verse

to an old song,

that transformed a past pain

into healing and peace.

I will not share the darkened past.

But gladly I share the new:

Lying still, I feel my breath 

Slowing down I am at rest 

 Now I feel some calm 

Painful past fades like a song 

Is it only that my thoughts were dark?

Is it me who now breaks my own heart?

 Breathing in, I feel more calm 

Breathing out those thoughts are gone 

No past lives here anymore 

I feel free when I breathe away my thoughts

a long lost smile, a sunrise in my heart 

I slipped out of the dark.

* * * * * * * * * * *

the sun as it rose today

from the view of my laptop’s camera

through my bedroom window

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Oh Jolly Playmate!

Today I had my Reiki session in Venice Beach.

Just typing that makes me feel like a hippie.

I came home and went on the balcony

To meditate on the moon

Out and Beautiful,

more than halfway full.

A warm dusk with windows open,

and people in the courtyard

* * * * * * * * * * *

I noticed something curious.

From my balcony view,

I could see energy.

From a tree across the street

Or rather in front of it.

It looks a little like static on old television

I don’t know how Reiki works.

I only know something is happening.

The energy that pulses through me in session,

is quite remarkable.

Rocks are used, touch, and occasional vocal sounds from this amazing healer

It reminds me of the Six Sacred sounds of Qi Gong.

And this ancient QiGong healing practice is reminiscent of Sanskrit chanting.

All sounds for healing the body,

and other things as well.

In different parts of the world,

In different centuries,

Long before we could have known one another,

Humans coming up with the same answers, same approaches,

Same Truths, Same Gods, different names,

Identical principles.

The ancient Vedas, the sacred I-Ching,

The pre-Socratic Greeks, the teachings of Buddha,

Jainism, all 52 Gnostic Gospels of Christ . . . and so on.

Truth with a capital T exists

But it has never been dominant in our culture.

I want to be one to help change this.

* * * * * * * * * * *

Bedtime:

I ceremoniously introduced three angels,

made known to me by my healer,

into my prayer life.

I’m open minded,

but angels by name, felt a bit Shirley Maclaine.

Yet  I trust my healer and devote myself to her guidance.

I found pronunciations for the angels’ names online.

(Ironically, from Shirley Maclaine)

Afterwards I was very tired and fell into a very deep sleep.

* * * * * * * * * * *

I awoke after a long sound rest,

Feeling joy and the desire to play.

The children’s song, “Oh Jolly Playmate!” song was in my head.

I haven’t thought of that since pre-school.

In my semi-dream state hazily awakening

I had a very childlike free spirited vision of . . .

my Higher Self and I, singing this nursery rhyme to each other,

doing the hands and the whole bit.

Yes, the day began with visions of

patty-cake with my Higher Self.

In this confessional,

My abject Humiliation is complete.

(Ha!)

Truthfully . . . I didn’t mind the experience.

“Be as little children,” He said.

He knew.

Beneath Personality

Absorbed In Experience,

There is no Self.

Perhaps my angels are inviting me to come play in life.

Make Life Play.

And leave that heavy adult baggage marked “SELF,” behind.

And I say, YES!

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